Okay, I started with Facebook, with an ad for seniors who want to date. It led to a website where I would have to pay money so I quit filling in my information there.
Then Helen remembered a site that she thought might be solely for non-heterosexual people. It’s called Plenty of Fish. We looked it up and it turned out to be both free and quite comprehensive. Not only is it for all types and all ages, but it gives lots of advice on how to create your profile, what to do on the first date, what not to talk about, etc.
I signed up and had four responses in less than 24 hours. Exciting!
Today is Mike’s last day until April 19th. We packed a lot in today since our lives overlap so much with both Landmark and Inclusion. However busy we needed to be, today’s activities included checking out the responses that came through this morning!
Before you know it I was “chatting” with a man who lives in Hamilton and is originally from Iraq. I am not a very fast typist when it comes to chatting and so I happily encouraged Mike to do the messaging. Once again, within minutes, I was pushing his boundaries, and in some senses he was pushing mine. On the one hand I was asking his advice on how I should respond. On the other he jumped in at least once to answer the guy’s comments before I had said anything. This led to a very productive conversation about what is weird and what is too much and the value to me of having opportunities to mix friendship, experience and support. Among other things I realized this morning that such boundary melding sometimes actually gives me more safety, not less, and it certainly gives me valuable insight into the worlds of younger people, walking people, and just simply people who get to see parts of the world that I will never see.
Anyways, I now have a coffee date for tomorrow morning. We are going to go to the Yalla Café. Not only do I feel welcome and comfortable there, but Helen and Michel, the café owners and operators, love me and will give me a very good perspective on how this new guy is as a potential relationship. If anything, Michel may be somewhat paternalistic and that at least will be funny.
It’s all very different from any time I’ve tried dating before. It’s funny but this thing about expressing myself with fewer inhibitions has really shifted my world and its possibilities.
I will, of course, write a story about how it goes. Now it is time to sleep.
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