November 2, 2010

Well God saved us.

I came home without a catheter and without a PICC line. The doctors and technicians were very responsive, Helen was funny and anxious, and Lorraine was steady and responsive. Although parts of the test were uncomfortable mostly it went off without a hitch. We discovered that my bladder has FULLY recovered after a rest of 5 weeks and is free both from infections and stones. Throughout the day I have peed in the usual way without difficulty and I seem to be home free on that account.

Having had such a positive outcome Helen and I decided to go off to St. Mike’s and see if we could round up Dr. Ray and get permission to take the PICC line out. Both doctors at the eurodynamics clinic said they were not permitted to do so. As I found my way to the Ambulatory Clinic Dr. Ray and I ran into each other. He took me to a room and simply removed the PICC line himself – all ten purple inches of it. I am no longer tethered to medical equipment. I am free. I am no longer sick. I am still in pain, but not as much.

At lunch in the cafeteria I ran into our buddy from the 14th floor, the nutrition researcher, Stanley. Perhaps I will take another time in the near future and write more about him – I realize that there was a lot that went on in the hospital that none of the readers of these two pagers will know about. Stanley was a real breath of fresh air during those difficult nine days. Besides taking data from me about my eating habits as I recovered he took a real interest in my life, my assistants, my circle and my art. He spent many more five minute periods with me than data collection required and even went out of his way to help us find palatable food when the nausea was at its worst.

We sat at his table, shared lunch and talked about his research. He asked me a lot of questions about my daily life and became more and more inspired by the kooky life that I live. Later, Lorraine suggested that I invite him to my circle and I think that is a very, very fine idea.

Then it was off to Laser Eagles. When I arrived most everybody was there and even Greg had shown up although it had been predicted that his Wheeltrans would have been cancelled. We talked painting, we talked fundraising – it was clear that new life has been breathed into this enfeebled collective. By 2:30pm I was exhausted and needed to go buy a knee brace due to the fact that I managed to twist my knee during the bladder test. In spite of this crash at the end of a miraculous day I remain pretty up beat. Truly the prayers of many, many have been answered.

As I returned to bed Mike hung out to write some more for the upcoming WPIT website. My tongue was “loosened” as they say. I told him and Helen a couple of stories from the World Peace through Inclusion Tour. I went on to talk about the years of struggle before the Tour was envisioned working for the service system that led me to an abrupt decision to take off and explore inclusion. At one point I regretted that Mike wasn’t typing because it could have been my two pager for today. Alas, he was not focused on me but on the website. Someday soon I will begin to record some of these stories.

I realize just how much I am not dying at this point. Although I am uncertain that I can pick up life as it was – that would be silly considering how stressful and unhealthy it turned out to be – I am full of energy and desire to live an exciting life. Whether it be writing stories, Laser Eagles, WPIT, friends, Wisdom, walks in the parks by the lake, amazing food, trips to the Lebanese café a few blocks away, letting my father buy me a greasy spoon lunch, or bantering with one or more of my personal assistants – life is rich and longing to be lived!