December 18, 2010

I made $0 today. Dad paid the $26 to fix the tire. Tomorrow I will make nothing and on Monday I will make $500.

I rested today, levelled up twice in Farmville, did some Wisdom preparation for our course completion night, some ROM related stuff, and visited with Steve for a couple of hours. Then I went Christmas shopping with my hyper eleven year old friend, Kevin, from down the hall. His mother, Sherry, practically worshipped me when I picked him up. I can only imagine that he is a handful – the kind of child that REALLY needs a whole village to raise him.

Yet having him around as he has been for the last eight days feels good mostly. Boundaries are needed – yes. I amused and shocked myself when I first saw that he had taken a half a pie out of its box and put it on his personal plate! There was no measured thought in my parent-like response to that one! But both the wanting to and being able to effectively intervene were right there, and it felt good! Yes, he can be safe with me.

Otherwise we rode in the car, shopped at a used everything store for Christmas stuff and ate together. I learned that the current word for “very good” is “Bam”. It feels good to know that too.

I realize that I present questions, suggestions, alternatives and explanations to Kevin that often make no sense to him or of no interest. Tonight I decided that this is not a problem. I recalled how Dad talked endlessly at a level usually just out of reach, and continuously presented reading material and other information that had nothing to do with my reality. But he kept in touch somehow with my world as I think I am with Kevin’s. I think this because Kevin keeps on coming back for more.

When I was ready and willing to be available I had Dad’s world already with me. So I felt OK today with explaining to a fidgety eleven year old how one gets a driver’s license while he wasn’t listening or comprehending much, yet was also hanging in for the whole experience.

A poor kid with labels based on his perception differences with a great Mom in a bunch of fractured relationships – half a hallway away. It has taken fifteen months and two parties to find them, or rather, for them to be willing to come close. I held those parties with Peter’s assistance because of genuinely believing in WPIT, Giftedness and John McKnight style community development.

I feel like I am on a number of thresholds and that something is breaking my way. Can it be that once again the universe is willing for me to have my dreams come true? Actually I imagine that the Universe has always been willing. It’s just that it is never just about me and so whole worlds must shift for things to line up. They are shifting.

Perhaps the Universe is with me as my Dad was with me when I was ten, or as I am with Kevin now. It is presenting me with the dream, the world and the pathways. However I can only dimly catch the drift right now. Just the same I am getting that there is a drift to catch and I am willing. Is it possible that I am now also close to being able?